UKIP voters to grow moustaches in homage to Farage

Moustachioed men make excellent second hand car salesmen - allegedly.

Moustachioed men make excellent second hand car salesmen – allegedly.

Now that he’s got “our country back” and stepped down as UKIP leader in order to get his life back one might be forgiven for hoping that we’d seen the last of Nigel Farage, but no, just like the proverbial bad penny the obnoxious little twerp keeps on rearing his fugly toad like head and spouting bollocks across the media.

Now he’s even grown a moustache – although God knows why, because he looks an even bigger twonk with a ‘tache – and UKIP voters are following the Fuhrer’s lead in a bid to achieve the suave, debonair WWII fighter pilot look.

Although we think he looks more like the dirty rotten scoundrel he really is. The despicable cad.

“I’m growing a ‘tache like Nigel,” said UKIP voter Eddie Thickneck from Thanet. “And so are all me mates, and I hope all UKIP voters follow suit then we can recognise each other in pubs and that and strike up friendships and stuff with like minded bigots we might not otherwise have known think like what we do.”

“I think growing a ‘tache like Nigel is a great idea showing solidarity among patriotic Brexiteers,” said UKIP voter George Goebbels of Sunderland. “And it’s not sexist at all because all the women who vote UKIP have ‘taches too so it’s a win-win all round.”

The mind boggles…